How I Made My Father Uncomfortable. Part 2 Feat. Simon and Garfunkel

Part 2 out of an infinite amount. I have a knack for making my father uncomfortable.

We were a Simon and Garfunkel family.

Also a Tina Turner, The Beetles, Fleetwood Mac, Michael Jackson, Joni Mitchell family.

Simon and Garfunkel was one of my favorites though. The first vinyl I purchased for $1 at a thrift store that when I was in middle school. Wednesday Morning 3am.

My dad loves Simon and Garfunkel, probably leaning heavier towards the Simon. They filmed part of One Trick Pony (a highly mediocre to terrible film that was vaguely reminiscent of Paul Simon's career) in my Dad's home town and he proudly talks about trying to be an extra in a bar scene. "I was almost in that movie."

We listened to Simon and Garfunkel in the car often. We sang along a lot. Loudly and joyfully. I love the group more now because they make me think of hanging out with my dad.

The song Cecilia came on one day when he was driving me to one of the many waspy extra curricular activities I got to partake in. I was probably 8 or 9 and I needed some clarity regarding this relationship between our smooth-singing narrator and this lady Cecilia. The following is by NO means a transcript, who knows how my memory has morphed and changed this conversation over the last few decades but this is roughly how I recall it:

It may be useful to know that there was never a time in my memory that I didn't know what sex was, or in context of this song, making love. Mom just made sure we knew way more than we wanted to.

Young Me: So, he finds her cheating on him.

Dad: Yep.

Young Me: And then he's happy she takes him back?

Dad: Uh-Huh.

Young Me: I would think that he would have to take HER back, because she's the one cheating?

Dad: I guess not.

Young Me:... He just went to wash his face and he comes back and she's already cheating on him!? How long did it take him to wash his face?!

Dad: I don't know. Maybe... poetic license?

Young Me: And why is he so excited when she loves him again? Don't they have some talking to do if she replaced him so quickly? And what's that he says after?

Dad: "I fall on the floor and I'm laughing."

Young Me: That doesn't make any sense! Why isn't he more upset? She slept with another man within, like, minutes! That just sounds like a really bad couple. She doesn't treat him very well. But I really like the music.

Dad: Wanna listen to the next track?

Young Me: Is it The Boxer? What's a whore and why is it on Seventh Avenue and comfortable?

Okay, that last one was a leap of artistic license, but you get the idea. I preferred posing these questions to my Dad because I could gain not only literal meaning, but also social standing of the topic by gauging his comfort level. Mom was comfortable talking about anything and often told us more than we wanted to know about a given topic. Mom and I would have had a discussion about how it's not really any of our business who Cecilia's sleeping with because we're not in a relationship with her.

I think it's worth mentioning that while pulling an image for this post, I did some light reading on the song and found that Simon's intent was a song for St. Cecilia, the patron saint of music in Catholicism. This makes a lot of sense and I'm willing to bet that my dad wished he knew that when I asked him more than two decades ago, but the conversation would likely not have been nearly as memorable.

Cecilia. Patron Saint of Music and fickle, fickle mistress.

Tune in next time when I ask my Dad why the SNL skit where Southern women get really excited when "Colonel Ingus" comes back to town.